Do you have china sitting untouched in your cabinet?
China is like relationships ~ here are 5 ways to “use the china” in your relationships.
Hey y’all, welcome to Lovin My Daughter-in-law podcast where connection, love, and a whole lot of fun come together. I am LeAnn Austin, boy mom and teacher turned master-certified life coach, who once had all the feelings when cute girlies started dating my sons. I had to learn a lot about love, boundaries, and connection, not just with my daughters-in-law, but with myself. That’s how Lovin My Daughter-in-law was born.
So if you’re craving more love, connection, and fun in your life, especially the kind that starts from within, this podcast is for you.
Today’s episode #197: What Does China Teach Us About Relationships?
Back in the day, I got a china set from my grandma. These dishes have been sitting in my cabinet for decades, barely touched. My coach recently reminded me of my china, and I thought, why not actually use it? Well, as I was pulling it out, one of the cups slipped and broke. And of course my first thought was, Ugh, I should have just left it safely tucked away in the cabinet.
But as I was cleaning up the broken cup, it hit me ~ relationships are a lot like china. We tuck them away, try to keep them safe, but don’t really use them or interact much because we’re afraid they might break. But the truth is, relationships are meant to be used, just like our china. We want to enjoy them, celebrate, and be in the messiness when the breaking happens.
So how do we do this? Well, here are five simple ways to “use the china” in relationships.
First, notice what’s been sitting in your cabinet. Ask yourself, which relationships am I putting on display, but not really engaging in. Or, who in my life have I been keeping at arm’s length, someone I care about, but haven’t really reached out to lately?
This could be a friendship you haven’t reached out to, or a family member that you avoid because of past tensions, or even your partner when you’re just going through the motions. Remember that ignoring a relationship doesn’t protect it. It really keeps it from being enjoyed.
Number two, take them out and use them. Using china is investing in the relationship. This can look like initiating time together, sending a text just to say hey, or asking deeper questions instead of staying surface level. Relationships are built by using them consistently, not storing them for special occasions.
What is one small way you could use that relationship this week? A phone call, a text, an invitation to lunch?
Number three, of how we use the china in relationships, expect a little breaking. Just like I broke that cup, when you start engaging more, things can get messy. Disagreements, miscommunication, hurt feelings – it’s all part of relationships.
What if you allowed yourself to believe that a little breaking isn’t failure, it’s part of the process? Instead of fearing the cracks, remember they are regular part of a real life connection.
Number four, practice rupture and repair. Can you think of a time when a relationship was repaired after a misunderstanding or conflict? The beauty is in repairing. Saying sorry, clarifying, forgiving, laughing about it.
Remember, repair is what strengthens the bond. It makes the relationship more resilient than if it had never been cracked. Think about what would it feel like to give yourself permission to repair instead of aiming for perfect?
Relationships aren’t meant to sit on a shelf like fine china, use them, enjoy them, even if they crack – repair makes them stronger.
And number five, celebrate the beauty of imperfection. Some of the most meaningful dishes are the ones with chips and cracks. They carry the stories. The same is true for relationships. The broken and repaired moments often become the most cherished.
What’s one perfectly imperfect relationship in your life that you’re actually grateful for – even with its cracks and chips?
And as you are using your china and strengthening your relationships, I want you to remember these five things: Notice what’s been sitting in your cabinet. Take them out and use them. Expect a little breaking. Practice rupture and repair. And celebrate the beauty of imperfection.
So maybe it’s time to open your cabinet, pull out a relationship, use it, risk a little breaking, and enjoy the process. This is exactly what we explore in Connection Crew: showing up in relationships, creating more fun, and learning how to repair and strengthen even when things are messy. If you’re ready to stop storing relationships on the shelf and start living in them, come join us in Connection Crew! We’d love to have you there.
Relationships are meant to be used, loved, and yes, sometimes cracked. That’s where the magic happens. Hmm, something to think about.
Here’s to china, relationships, fun, connection and love. Have a good one y’all.
Thanks for hanging out with me today on Lovin My Daughter-in-law podcast. I hope you’re walking away with a little more connection, love, and lightness in your heart.
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And if you’re tired of walking on eggshells, second guessing yourself, feeling disconnected, or ready to learn all about your nervous system – come join us inside Connection Crew or grab some One-on-One coaching. I’d love to be your coach and cheer you on.
Until next time, be you, love you, build connections, and have some fun.