When was the last time you let yourself be new at something?
Here are 5 things I share about beginners. Because that’s where the growth happens, and it’s a whole lot more fun too!
Welcome to Lovin My Daughter-in-law podcast. I’m relationship expert and master certified coach LeAnn Austin. I’ll help you create more connection, love, and fun with others, yourself and your daughter-in-law.
Hey y’all, welcome to Lovin My Daughter-in-law, episode #182: Permission to Be a Beginner
So glad you’re here. Lovin My Daughter-in-law podcast is where we talk about love, relationships, connection, fun, and the beautiful messiness of being a human.
Today we’re diving into something I believe every single one of us needs to hear: Permission to Be a Beginner.
So often we hold ourselves back because we think we need to be good before we start. Good at the relationship, good at the new job, good at the hard conversation. But what if confidence isn’t something you get before you start? It’s something you build along the way.
Today we’re going to talk about what it looks like to embrace beginner energy, why it matters for your growth, your relationships, and your joy, and why waiting until you’re quote “ready” is overrated.
When was the last time you let yourself be new at something? Not perfect, not polished, just beautifully awkwardly, bravely new.
So many of us avoid starting new things because we’re terrified of not being good at them right away. Culturally, we glorify expertise and overnight success. But confidence is born in the trying, not the mastering. Giving yourself permission to be a beginner opens doors to growth, resilience, joy, and meaningful connection.
And a little side note, right now in Connection Crew, we are talking about strengthening our confidence muscles. So join us today if you want to strengthen your confidence muscles.
Now, when I was three years old, my parents put me in dance lessons because I kept tripping over the sidewalk cracks. I danced a lot growing up, but as I got older, I stopped. Fast forward about five years ago – I thought it might be fun to try an adult tap class. At first, I hesitated because I knew I wouldn’t be that good at it, and the idea of starting from scratch felt a little embarrassing, but I signed up anyway.
And guess what? I’m still not great at it. I forget the moves. My feet don’t always make the right sounds. And during our annual recital, it’s obvious that I have beginner written all over me, but I’ve learned something really valuable. It’s okay to be a beginner. In fact, it’s good for us. It reminds me that growth comes when we give ourselves permission to not have it all figured out and to show up anyway to enjoy the process. And if I’m a beginner in tap dancing for the rest of my life. No problem. I am creating movement, fun, and connection in my life, which is way more important to me than being an expert.
So here are five things to remember about being a beginner…
First: Beginner energy is magnetic. People admire willingness to show up imperfectly. Think about it. What do you enjoy watching more? The underdog who is just beginning and figuring it out, or the expert. I love watching newbies and learning from how they just keep trying no matter what.
Second thing to remember about being a beginner. Growth comes from discomfort. If you want to grow, feeling uncomfortable is part of it. And so much strength happens when you’re willing to fill that discomfort and do it anyway. I love Brené Brown’s quote: “The middle is messy, and that’s where the magic is.” We can’t skip the messy middle, and remind yourself of the growth you’re achieving because you’re willing to feel all the feels and do it anyway.
The third thing to remember about being a beginner: Perfectionism is fear in disguise, and it’s also the birthplace of shame. Perfectionism is when we are so concerned with what other people will think, that we don’t even give something a try. We aren’t beginning any particular thing because we think we have to be so good at it. We stay stuck and not doing the things that we really want to do.
Fourth thing about being a beginner: Curiosity is way greater than competence. When we lead with curiosity, everything changes. We don’t need to be competent at everything. We can simply get curious and be a beginner.
And a last thing to remember about being a beginner: Everyone you admire was once a beginner too. We don’t magically do things amazingly well. Remind yourself that everyone begins somewhere. It doesn’t matter what age or the specific thing. If you want to try something, do it. Be a beginner. The fun, the growth and the connection you create for yourselves and others when you try new things is life changing.
My challenge to you is to try one thing this week that you’ve been avoiding because you don’t feel good enough yet, and give yourself permission to be a beginner.
I love this quote from Barbara Sher: “You can learn new things at any time in your life if you’re willing to be a beginner. If you actually learn to like being a beginner, the whole world opens up to you.” Hmm, something to think about.
Alright, friends, thanks so much for hanging out with me today. I hope this gave you a little nudge to say yes to something new. And remember, last week’s episode, growth lives in the going, not in the waiting. So go be a beginner in anything you’d like.
If you enjoyed this episode, would you take a second to rate and review the podcast? It helps more people find these conversations and I’d be so grateful. And if you are craving a community where you can show up just as you are and grow right alongside us, come join Connection Crew. We’d love to have you there.
Until next time, here’s to giving yourself grace, lots of love and permission to be a beginner. Have a good one, y’all.
Thanks so much for tuning in. If you enjoyed this episode and want to create more fun connection and love into your relationships, check out my Connection Crew membership and One-on-One Coaching programs. This is where I share practical strategies to help you deepen your relationships.
Plus, I’ve got some fun free goodies that you won’t want to miss.
If you are ready to transform your connections from the inside out, start with my free Connection Blueprint, your easy three step guide to connecting with yourself and others on a whole new level.
And here’s a bonus. If you are looking to strengthen your bond with your daughter-in-law, grab my One Question that will instantly boost the love and understanding in your relationship.
All the details, including your free Connection Blueprint and that powerful One Question are here or at leannaustin.com.
Don’t wait. Start creating those deeper, more meaningful connections today.