Infertility Fears

DWQA QuestionsCategory: QuestionsInfertility Fears
meganb433 asked 6 months ago
Yesterday my husband and I attended a required class at our IVF clinic about injections. I was in tears early-on in the meeting and spent the second half crying in the bathroom on the phone with my mom. I think fear is taking over right now. I haven't started injections yet, so besides a few minor symptoms from the 8 pills I take at breakfast, I feel pretty good. I'm so worried about all the unknowns. What if I don't feel good? Who can help me? What if the injections are painful? What if we don't get any embryos? As I worry more, I notice that my husband worries more. He feels bad that we have to do IVF. I want to approach this from faith and empowerment. I think our chances of success will increase if I can stop holding so tightly to the fear in my stomach all day long. Any suggestions?   As a follow up - I also have a lot of thoughts in my head about the process of "losing embryos." For example, when I come out of my egg retrieval procedure, the doctor will tell me how many eggs they collected. Each day after, they will report how many are progressing. I feel a lot of sadness and scarcity about the fact that this number will continue to go down. Scientifically, every case I've seen and every person I've spoken with says they start with many and are left with few in the end. For some, many means 30 and few means 13. For others, many means 7 and few means 1. Any way I look at it, I feel so stuck in scarcity.
1 Answers
2leann answered 6 months ago

First off, so much love your way. It totally makes sense that you feel fear, worry, scarcity, sadness and any other emotion that is coming up for you.

Take some time to sit with whatever you’re feeling. Put your hand on your heart, take a deep breath, and feel what is happening in your body. Doing this for a few minutes every day helps to allow whatever emotion you are experiencing.

With the questions your brain is asking, take time to answer each of them. Giving your brain an answer and even going to worst case scenario can be helpful, because typically when we really think about the worst case, we can figure it out.
These are some of the questions you asked:
What if you don’t feel good?
Who can help you?
What if the injections are painful?
What if you don’t get any embryos?

Really think about the answers and notice what comes up for you.

As far as fear in your stomach all day long. When we allow fear to be there, rather than resist it, it begins to dissipate. Notice what fear feels like in your stomach, where it is, really explore that feeling in your body.

As far as “losing” embryos. I believe how you explained it is factually how it works for everyone. The doctor retrieves the eggs, and the number goes down. So simply knowing that yes, the number will go down is how it scientifically works.

Explore different ways you could think about this rather than “losing” embryos. What about: “gaining” opportunities for babies, the number of viable eggs will be the right amount for us, we only need one to work, or any other thought that you want to practice believing.

Thank you for sharing this situation and strengthening your mental and emotional muscles. Remember awareness + acceptance = empowered
You are aware what’s happening. Practice loving and accepting you right where you’re at, which will empower you to continue moving forward towards where you want to be.

Keep the questions coming anytime~

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