I recently taught a workshop about “playing in the gray”, and as I’ve been practicing this in my life, I’ve discovered it’s a great place to play!
There is a thought pattern, that you may have noticed in yourself or others. It’s referred to as Black and White Thinking – defined as the inability to bring together both positive and negative perceptions of self, others, or circumstances into a realistic, whole view.
So Black & White thinking are thoughts that makes people think in absolutes: swing from one extreme to the other, believing something is all good or all bad.
When you’re observing Black and White Thinking…what are some words that come up?
For Example, some of the words associated with Black & White Thinking are…
Always/never
Right/wrong
All in/all out
On/off
All/nothing
Good/Bad
Gray Thinking is the in-between spectrum of black and white. Gray thinking lacks clearly defined characteristics. It’s ambiguous, uncertain ~ a mindset open to new ideas.
When we’re playing in the gray, what are some words that come up?
Always/never becomes sometimes
All/nothing becomes some
Perfect or imperfect become good at some things and bad at others
Or becomes And
I’ve been practicing this in my life:
I used to think I had to be eating all the sugar or none of the sugar – there was no in-between. I was either on track or off track
Now, I play in the gray – where I have some sugar, and sometimes more than I want, but I’m learning to not make it be a problem.
As I love myself and love different aspects of my body, eating some sugar is something I’m getting better at, instead of all or none.
One other thing I’ve been practicing is B- work. I used to think everything had to be perfect, but I discovered that there were things I wouldn’t even attempt because I didn’t think they’d be good enough.
Now I know that it’s okay if my wording isn’t exact, or my picture isn’t me all dolled up. B- work is like playing in the gray to me, and you know what, it’s sharing info and helping me learnrather than doing nothing at all.
There’s a quote I love by Brené Brown:
“The middle is messy, but it’s also where the magic happens.”
Hmmm, something to think about.
Have a good one y’all ~ and here’s to love and playing in the gray!
